Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Crime and Punishment?

A few short years ago I surpassed the weight limit for the individual speed boats at Disney World. The weight limit was 250 lbs. I was looking forward to the day when I could safely get behind the wheel of a small zippy water sprite and speed around the lakes. Right at the time I lost enough weight to do it they changed the boats and raised the limit to 325 lbs. I had lost the weight and could more than safely enjoy a sail but I could not bring myself to go and enjoy the experience. I kept putting it off.  I do not know why I did that, when I could have sailed anytime in the past three years . . . 

Maybe in a crazy way I was punishing myself for having been so obese? In not allowing myself to have the experience, was I 'protecting' myself from how I would feel the day I gained the weight back and lost the privilege again? 

I was not a 'bad' person for being obese. I am not a 'good' person for losing weight. Obesity is not a crime. I have already punished my body too much to keep punishing by brain by denying myself enjoyable activities that have nothing to do with food. 

There is no crime in personal obesity or obsessive eating disorders. Do not punish yourself with excess food. Do not punish yourself by withdrawing from the wonderful things to be experienced in life. This is a life worth living!

Have you charged yourself with a 'crime' and doled out a punishment for your eating disorder? Give yourself a full pardon. You are not a criminal.   There is great joy in letting go of the ball and chain. 

Please share how you have stopped punishing yourself for a crime you did not commit. 

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