Friday, January 25, 2013

Tears and a Good Day

Had a verbal interaction this morning that left me with a couple of tears. Once I was alone it became a full no-tears-held back bawling session. The feelings brought up memories of past moments when I certainly interacted with people in the same fashion with which I was treated this morning - unaware then that when I left the room, another person's tears may have flowed in the same manner. 

I will not deny the past, nor can I change it. Feelings about it do not have to control what I do today. I don't have to eat over it. I just have to acknowledge it. I cried - hard and painful tears but I let them out and I acknowledge the feelings without trying to make them 'feel better'. 

It would be so easy to eat my way into numbness and let go of the pain. Easy until the numbness wore off and then I would have pain upon pain. 

Instead I believe if I just feel it a little more without trying to gloss over it with excuses or food, I will find that it is nothing else but what it already is - a painful moment, thought and memory, not something to rule my existence. 

So yes, it is still  good day. 

Jane~

5 comments:

♫ Drazil ♪ said...

It IS still a good day because it is what you make of it. Great attitude!

Determination said...

Hang in there. I just wrote about allowing yourself to mourn and move on, be sad and move on. It has really helped me in my journey!

Anonymous said...

So sorry you had to go through that conversation. But good for you for not turning to food. That is great!
Take care !

MeAgain_360 said...

Very good! It is easy (for the moment) to eat it better. But you've realized that in the bigger picture this is just one stroke of the painter's brush and emotional eating only causes smears and unwanted clumps. It IS a good day, like Drazil said, because of your attitude.

A said...

This helped me today. Thank you.