Saturday, June 8, 2013

Sugary Bait on the Rim of a Hellmouth

I am not surprised to find there are people discussing, making and eating foods that are (depending on my frame of mind at the moment), akin to food-grade crack and sugary bait on the rim of a hellmouth. I am astonished to find that they are coming up with ideas that, in my darkest sugar pit, I never considered.

It all started yesterday with a story in the news about a New York chef who combined the croissant with a doughnut and spawn the "Cronut." They are $5 each and people are lining up for HOURS to try and get one every morning. I am not going to describe it to you or show any photos. People are paying $40 a piece for them on craig's list. (Diabetes testing kit not included). 

Yet, even the Cronut is not as warped as the next link I clicked in the story. It brought me to a discussion on ice cream bread. Seriously? People are taking Ben and Jerry's ice cream, mixing it with self rising flour, baking it and eating bread made from ice cream. To quote one person "It looks like a brownie and tastes like bread: it makes my head hurt." I think it would make my head spin a 360. The Jane I like to wear as me today is horrified for the future of the species. Surely I would never, ever eat such a thing. The addict within peaks out her head and scans the article voraciously while licking her lips in expectation. Alas, that is the war inside my head some days: the food-sober me knows better and the addict me doesn't care what I know. Today the addict was disappointed. The recipe and photos did not make me wish I could make, bake or eat . Just looking at it made me feel a little queasy. 

There was another link that my itchy trigger finger clicked on that led me to a photo that activated my gag reflex: Cake nachos.

Even my inner-addict did not want to bite into this one. I got a sugar-headache just looking at the photo. 

If I was into my disease today would I have found the photo tempting. God, I hope not. What's next? How much more can the sugar/savory barrier be breached before we are looking at cheesecake pizza and hot buffalo wing ice cream? 

Could there be anything worse than that?



Mary Ellen Quigley said...

Some of that stuff sounds and looks disgusting. I especially hate all the advertisements for the Dunkin Donuts breakfast sandwich that is on a glazed donut. Really? That is disgusting. I don't know what people are thinking.

Unknown said... I hadn't heard about any of those things. I am not sure about those cake nachos. I think I might have outgrown that phase. Still...WOW.
I found your blog through a link on someone else's blog (wish I could give credit, but I can't remember).
Love it!

Vickie said...

I stopped doing online news (I tried it for a bit) exactly because of this type of thing. I am back to recording a few well chosen news shows on the DVR so I have the ability to make them less (blinking thru commercials and stories such as the ones you mentioned, which are rarely on these news shows) but never more (no links which lead to more links, it was like there was no quantifiable definition of beginning and end of the "news", really enlightening). I don't look in the processed food aisles either. So, I kind of live in a world where this stuff just doesn't exist. . .

Norma said...

None of these creations should surprise any of us. Food factories have scientists, marketers, "chefs," and focus groups coming up with terrifying, over-the-top, absolutely poisonous ideas practically 24/7 to get and keep us fat and coming back for more.

RedPanda said...

... food-grade crack and sugary bait on the rim of a hellmouth

What a great expression! Seriously, I find this kind of thing obscene.

Drop Cookies said...

Nothing could there be anything worse than that..:(