Saturday, June 15, 2013

You've Got Mail (from a Bakery!)

The postman (who normally does not even ring once) rang twice to alert me he was leaving a package at the door. I picked it up and found it was made out to both my husband and to me, meaning it is not business related for either of us. Then I noticed that the return address was to a bakery in Connecticut. A bakery? Someone sent me something in a box from a bakery. Before even opening the package I was trying to figure out who could have sent it - and how to plan my revenge on them for sending me SOMETHING FROM A BAKERY.

I know my husband would not have ordered anything from a bakery. I know my daughters know better than to send us bakery gifts, my true friends know better than that. What is in the package. It feels heavy, like a cake or maybe some kind of fudge. OMG, WHAT IS IN THE PACKAGE??

Pulse quickening, I take it into the kitchen and grab a sharp knife to slit open the sealing tape on the outside of the box. Is my mouth watering? I am wondering if I will be picking up a fork and stabbing the contents in a moment. I am fuming, concerned that whatever is in the box will find it's way into my mouth.

Without a plan 
and without a pause 
I pry open the flap 
and push the paper liner
 out of the way 
to find three bags 
of freshly baked
cookies . .

that I ordered for our DOG!

I am the culprit who ordered from a barkery (not bakery)  in Connecticut! A few weeks ago I was watching Shark Tank and saw the story of a young boy who started his own company selling freshly baked, preservative free, human-food-grade dog biscuits - healthy, sugar free treats for canines. The company is Ryan's Barkery I decided to support the company with an order of three bags of treats: peanut butter, lo fat cheddar and pumpkin-apple - and almost immediately forgot about it.

After getting a good laugh at myself I offered a treat to our bichon, who pronounced them delicious.

 No, I have not tried them.

Looking back at the box and the mailing label I see that it clearly reads BARKERY on the label and there is even a WOOF WOOF on the label in a large sized font. Clearly, this proves the theory that people see what they want to see.  I am very grateful for this pain-free lesson to remind me the importance of PAUSE/PAWS.

Sorry, I cannot help reaching for a pun, which, unlike a bun, has no calories.



Unknown said...

That is hilarious... loved it.

PJ Geek said...

how funny...ah bakeries, I can't even let my brain go there much less the body without a lot of drama

Losing The Rolls said...

Too funny. You had me anticipating what could be in the box. I saw that episode of Shark Tank, but don't have any pets. Have a great weekend, bakery free.

Karen said...


Before I was food sober:
I've seen dog biscuits at Einstein's and thought, oh, that looks good!

After I have been food sober:
I've also seen dog jerky chews and wondered if they were actually human beef or duck jerky!!!

One thing for sure, when I adopted my kittens a year ago, I buy them grain free food.

I remember that Shark Tank episode. Glad you are giving them your business.

Norma said...

This is probably the best blog post I have ever read.

Vickie said...

I was thinking like the bomb squad as I read - put it in a bucket full of water, dump it off a cliff, have your husband open it. . .

one would have been okay, two would have been littering, and three would have just been mean.

I have such a thing about anyone giving me an unknown, that I am not sure I would have opened it. Not just unknown food - a piece of paper at a fair, really anything, anywhere. I am the queen of my hands behind my back.

RedPanda said...

This is probably the best blog post I have ever read.

x 2

A Barkery - that is too cute! Kudos to you for supporting an enterprising small business, and for buying your doggie sugar-free treats.

Jane Cartelli said...

My dog and the neighbor's cocker both still love the cookies. Gave the dog a choice between one of these and some chew thing that has a sugar in it (as they all do) and he went for the cookie. There is no hope for the humans but the dogs and cats will rule the world in the future - if we do not keep them off with diabetes from giving them the wrong food.