Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Whose Food Is This Anyway?

I wanted to check in with any readers out there and say I am doing well. Not overeating, not food obsessing and not bitching complaining, whining, about people who choose to eat foods that I can't just because those same foods always manage to lead me back into food abusing myself.

That is really the issue, isn't it? What difference does it make to me what anyone else eats? If I need to point fingers and pronounce judgement on some other individual for what they choose to eat I know that in the final analysis I am an ass. The only difference anyone's food choices make in MY life is my resentment. The resentment that I cannot eat it and still maintain my weight loss. Maybe they can and maybe they can't. NO difference in my life unless I choose to live in a negative light. I don't like to live that way.

If SuzieQ eats cookies for breakfast, ice cream for lunch with a salad for dinner and can lose weight then good for her - I know that can never be me and that knowledge sets me free; free to live and let live. I am free to do what I need to do for my body and not control or judge the food of anyone else.

Acceptance is (as always) the key. I accept I will never be SuzieQ. I do not and will not ever have a body that ingests certain foods in moderation and without the adverse reactions of weight gain, cravings for more and all the crap that comes with abusing my body with food. What I cannot moderate, I must eliminate.

I will still shout, rant intelligently post my opinions on food manufacturers, advertisers and sellers but when it comes to what is consumed by you or any other individual, I want to keep the focus on my choices and my body. Keeping the pounds off is about me first.

I am eating cleanly and comfortably today. My meals are satisfying. I can eat with friends who choose to consume totally different foods. Just as I keep my tongue on my own fork, I keep my mind on my own plate. When that is hard to do I know I need to look at me, not at the food of anyone else.

If you have your own food in order, do you still have "beefs" about what someone else is eating?

*SuzieQ is not any particular person. I do not know of anyone (personally or blog) who eats as described. 

Jane~

5 comments:

Vickie said...

Because my kids are still in formative years (23, 19, 15 at the moment), we still talk a lot about food. Our organic weekly box for example. Ways of reducing processed. Substitutes for carbs. How to keep protein, carbs, fat in line.

None of that is me lecturing. It is topics of conversation. Actually topics of conversation for their friends too.

So actually as I type that, probably will always be topics of conversation around our house.

I have started going to a weekly luncheon. Not the fare I choose. So honestly, I have decided to fast on Wednesdays until evening and then eat my normal breakfast for late dinner (so I can take my daily meds).

Fasting can cause sort of a rebound effect for many eating disorder people. So I do not suggest it.

But for me it is a welcome tool I have used in the past to sort of reset myself once a week.

I ask for two pots of hot water and a lot of lemon, so I have something in front of me at the luncheon. And if anyone asks I say hard for me to eat away from home due to food sensitivities and allergies and migraines - which is a true statement.

Jane Cartelli said...

Vickie - concerns about food within our families is not part of what I posted. What and how my family eats can affect me when we share a home. Not so with food across the Internet.

E. Jane said...

As food addicts, (I know you consider yourself one, as I do), our primary concern needs to be absolutely about what we are putting in our own mouths. Becoming concerned about what others are eating (except for my hubby) needs to be none of my business, so I understand what you wrote and agree. I try to be oblivious to what friends eat at lunches and dinners, so that I can avoid "food anxiety." But I have also had to stop reading some blogs that feature too many food photos, because I find myself making comparisons about what I can and can't eat. Again, creating more food anxiety is not what I need.

PJ Geek said...

this is an area I work on and in some ways I succeed. Progress not perfection. They can't understand me and my food issues necessarily , so I keep my nose to my own business. I know that I need to just not look at their plate or their choices. Ignoring it is a conscious thing. Maybe one day it won't have to be.

I know that for me I let certain foods become "the focus" because of seasons, holidays, or because they just are available. (years of obsessions that have diminished quite a bit.) For me -right now - it works to say "I Can have it once but maybe I'll wait till the end of October,or maybe i'll wait till it's really cold, ..etc". but then those days or designations come and I question myself ..
do I really want that?, do I want to 'spend' 500 calories on that?"....I also seem to do better when I have certain things available to me in small portions. I guess this is what you refer to as moderating. I don't seem to want them as much. This was all part of the 'legalization' of certain things that a couple of dietician's worked on with me. This is a work in progress, and it's because I don't like how it affects the scale that I sometimes delegalize them for a while.

And then there are the things where the line is drawn in the sand for me. Just absolutely there would be no control and I can't, won't, don't have it near me. oddly, fruit cake is one of these things.

Sheri M said...

Great post Jane!!!