Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Kicking my Ass . .umptions

When I do everything right and someone else does something that negates what I have done . . . instead of blaming them, I am examining all I did. I explore if 'right' was truly all I could do. Often I find I did 'just enough'. Maybe I procrastinated. Maybe I hoped instead of acted. 

I recently placed an order for something I needed by a certain date. I paid for express delivery and did so willingly because I was the one who delayed placing the order early enough for ground shipping. The company website had a glitch and shipped my order ground. They are giving me a refund, of course (they are an excellent company). I could be furious at them for not doing it right and causing me to not have the product I need in time for a function I am handling. Instead, I realize that if I had not left this to the last minute, (1) I would not have needed the express shipping option (2) I would have had the product long before event day and (3) I would have done all I could do, when in fact, I did the least I could do and got lesser results for my efforts. 

It is not always as easy to point a finger at myself as it is to point a finger at someone else but when I do point the finger at myself with equanimity and honesty, the pointing gives me growth, not shame.  

It is a good learning lesson. 



Vickie said...

Really good post.

This is something I try to do with kids/husband, NOT woulda-shoulda-coulda, but instead keep my mouth shut and communicate better, in advance, the next time the situation arises.

Vickie said...

Learning not to get mad at ourselves, as well as not taking it out on anyone else, equally good growth lessons. Life is a heck of a lot more peaceful, even when stuff happens, as you wrote so well.