My regain reached 277 lbs this August. Exactly half of the 224 pounds I had lost were back on and my body was 10 years older. Those pounds did not find a hospitable home in my body. I was often in pain, unable to walk comfortably and basically felt like a slug with limbs. My recovery program teaches me I have to have a firm base before I can recover and that firm base starts with honestly hitting bottom. I was about as low as I could imagine: physically, emotionally and physically.
I am not blessed with a writing talent that can convey the amazing feelings that came when I accepted and let go. Rapture sounds a bit over the top but honestly, that about sums it up. No one should judge the feelings of someone else. You will just have to believe it or not believe it. It is up to you.
All I can tell you that as of August 19th I have not consumed food or beverages with added sugars (or any type), milk fat, artificial sweeteners, fried potatoes (or any type) or wheat. I weigh and measure my food. I keep track in writing. I have not had cravings. I have not had any struggle with food at all. It is an amazing difference. This food sobriety includes a vacation to the mountains, our anniversary, my birthday, Halloween, and a week-long cruise over Thanksgiving. In fact, I lost two pounds on the cruise even though I never exercised or did anything to break a sweat the whole week.
I just weigh myself on Saturdays now. Last time I weighed I was down 40 lbs, to 237. That was November 26th. I could not weigh on December 3rd.
On November 30th I was rushed to the ER with intense upper abdominal pain. What could cause that? I had my gallbladder out 32 years ago so it couldn't be stones, right? Wrong! Stones can form and block the common bile duct in the liver and block the liver (and I think pancreas). Back when I had the gall bladder the incision was 8 inches long. To get into my liver the surgeon went through my mouth, esophagus, stomach, bile duct and into the liver. No outside incision, no outside stitches.
Do you know what can cause stones to form this long after gall bladder surgery? Weight regain. Oh, you know what else causes stones? Losing weight too quickly. Here's a pun: We are damned if we lose and damned if we gain.
Keeping my food sobriety in the hospital was a challenge. I was on a clear liquid diet and they kept trying to get me to eat jello, sweetened juice, and ice pops. When I explained I didn't eat sugar you would have thought (from the looks I received) that I had two heads. When I said no to the artificially sweetened jello and ices they acted like I had three heads. "You have to eat!" said the doctor. "Then give me food I can eat! I can have chicken broth and unsweetened juice, please." Sugar is not medically necessary. When they moved me to full liquids they tried to tempt me with ice creams and puddings. I realized I am the only one that can defend my food sobriety. Both were tossed in the garbage. I got skim milk, almond milk, and unsweetened apple sauce. I think I got well faster without the sugar and crap. That is my opinion.
I have been home from the hospital for 6 days and today was back at work in the parks for a short event. I'll probably see a loss this week.
That is the update. I am finally doing well and am still well despite a trip to the hospital.
I decided recently that if I started blogging again I would bring different voice to this blog. I've learned more about myself these past few years. Where I can, I will liken that to keeping the pounds off. Let's see what happens.